Bad Writing Hall of Shame 2023

19th century novelist Edward Bulwer-Lytton wrote so badly that San José University started an annual contest to see who could write opening sentences even worse than his. This year, the Overlake School Library ran its annual bad writing contest, which garnered over 200 entries! By faculty vote, here are the winners for 2023, plus the winners in our new category—the “Accidentally great” sentence!

 

Bad Writing Contest Winner

Spring was my least favorite season, the time of the apocalypse, because no one, and I mean no one, could escape the Girl Scouts.

—Ellie, 8th                                       

Second Place

As I sank deeper into the water, realizing I couldn’t swim, I felt like a fish out of water, except I was in water, and I’m not a fish.            

—Hannah, 8th

Third Place

He was like an ant crossed with a dinosaur; strong, but probably should be dead.   —Raina, 7th

Honorable Mention—3 points

The bathroom was as cramped as my stomach after Thanksgiving with grandma.                          —Avni, 6th

As I was entering the bathroom, I saw my baby brother’s head, and heard his voice going “Wheeeeee!” as he swirled down the toilet.            —Alan, 6th

Accidentally Great Sentence Winner

I didn’t commit arson; I just set some stuff on fire.                  —Nathan, 5th

Second Place

I walked into the room and saw someone I hadn’t seen in 30 years – and I’m 12.    —Mishal, 7th

Third Place

I think my mom is broken; she told me to get off my computer while I was doing homework to go play video games.                   

—Ada, 8th

Honorable Mention—3 points

Once upon a time, there was a girl who was sick with “annoying sibling disease.”            —Katie, 6th